Jacob Matthew Sullivan of St. Louis, Missouri, passed suddenly and unexpectedly at age 23 on June 21, 2024.
Jacob was the cherished son of Matthew Sullivan and Elizabeth (Nelke) Sullivan, and the adored grandson of John Nelke and Jessie (Randazzo) Nelke and Theresa (Brown) Sullivan and the late Mark Sullivan. Jacob was loved wholly and completely by Eleanor (Ellie) Panicola. Jacob is also survived by many loving aunts, uncles, cousins, extended family, and friends.
Jacob was a graduate of Metro Academic and Classical High School. He graduated from the University of Missouri – St. Louis (UMSL) with a degree in Organizational Leadership, maintaining his scholarship for the full term of his studies. Soon after completing his degree, Jacob obtained his licenses qualifying him as a financial advisor. Jacob was actively managing client portfolios and working alongside his grandfather, John, in a succession plan scheduled to complete at the end of next year. His Papa commented that Jake brought passion, creativity, and a fresh perspective to the work.
At 6’ 5” one could always find Jacob in a crowd. However, it wasn’t just his size that made him stand out.
In Kindergarten, Jake lost his winter coat. His teacher sent him and a buddy to check the office’s Lost & Found for it, but no luck. Well, what’s a Kindergartener to do? Take it upon himself to exit the building and check the playground of course! In later school years he was described as “unusually creative” and a running theme of talking to his classroom neighbors “a little too much” emerged.
As a toddler he loved trucks and tools, somehow getting a toy jackhammer to do real damage.
Jacob was a fierce competitor without diminishing his competition – well, maybe some trash talk on the basketball court. To say he was an aggressive base runner would be an understatement, much to his Mother’s chagrin. Jacob got caught in a few run downs between bases and somehow managed to escape – multiple times! His fearless streak served him well as a soccer goalie, much to his Mother’s chagrin. He independently analyzed the psychology of penalty kicks and even managed to stop one. He played golf and pickleball with friends. This summer he joined friends in a kickball league and was awarded MVP for his many homeruns.
His ambition and drive extended beyond the courts and fields. Jacob enjoyed marathon Risk and Monopoly sessions with his family and poker nights with his crew. He briefly joined his Dad in karate training when he was young. While Jake only competed in one karate tournament, he took home the first place trophy for his kata demonstration. He enthusiastically went along with the summer camp programs his Mom, Beth, customized for him. Jacob enjoyed overnight camps at the Zoo, Science Center, and a week each year at Grandma Sullivan’s house, which included day camp at Binder Lake – one of his favorites. He brought home a first place medal from his triathlon camp, beautiful works of art from Third Degree Glass Factory and Craft Alliance. He gave us memories of fencing duels, dancing as Michael Jackson onstage, and an original song recording from COCA. Jake always looked forward to his annual week in Montauk for the Fourth of July.
His Mom and Ellie learned that even credit scores can be an entertaining and fun sport. Sometimes it seemed as if his ambition knew no bounds, yet it walked gracefully side by side with his kindness, huge heart and sharp mind.
Jacob’s strategic thinking was often on display. Whether it was while he was playing chess, helping clients, planning a camping trip, mapping out a recovery plan from his first ACL tear in order to return in time to play goalie his Senior year, or using tactics to escape parental oversight – much to his Mother’s chagrin.
He enjoyed watching and learning from Chef Ramsey and was developing as a wonderful and passionate cook. The smoke alarm only went off ninety percent of the time – gotta have that pan hot to sear the steak, after all.
Jacob was a connoisseur of Pokémon cards, but unselfish with what he knew and owned. He shared Pokémon items, knowledge and passion with family members and kids in the neighborhood.
He briefly volunteered at Little Sisters of the Poor, alongside his Nana, where he assisted at meal times. Jacob learned quickly from the elderly residents that there was an established system and order to things at meal time. He good-naturedly went with the flow and still lent them his smile.
Jake was a sneakerhead, a protector of animals, a talented artist, a thoughtful gift giver, an impatient fisherman, a LOUD video gamer, a wild Jet Ski rider, an effective stage manager of a Phantom Tollbooth production at Kennard, an alto saxophone player at McKinley, and a gifted nature photographer – instinctively knowing how to frame the image, like his Grandpa Sullivan. Jacob’s younger cousins even named an Elf on the Shelf after him. He was ambitious, wicked smart, patient and kind. Several friends offered stories of Jacob either sticking up for them in bullying and peer pressure situations or watching him find the person in the room that was sitting alone and going over to chat with them. He loved roller coasters, Harry Potter, the Walking Dead, Catan, lifting weights, and playing video games.
In 2022, he took an invention of his, found a lawyer in the appropriate field, and worked with her to file a provisional patent application with the US government. In preparation for selling the patent, he conceived a company name, designed a logo, and filed with the state of Missouri doing business as Sullivan Unlimited. In attempts to have a prototype of his design manufactured, he located appropriate companies and, um – “maneuvered” his way into a phone meeting with a key decision maker at one of the companies. Ultimately, the patent remained provisional and we enjoyed watching this young entrepreneur grow and learn, often while we sat in awe.
Jacob was lucky to have several opportunities to travel in his young life. Most recently Ellie and Jacob enjoyed a cruise to South America with stops in Honduras, Belize and Mexico.
On May 15, 2024, Ellie and Jacob moved into their first apartment. They organized their space quickly, assembling the furniture they chose together, arranging each room, and adding special touches that showed they now had a home together. They were settling into their new routines with busy days and taking turns preparing meals. Well, turns might be stretching it – but Ellie did once prepare a shrimp pasta dish. They were participating in volleyball and kickball leagues, creating silly TikToks together, joining friends for dinners and special outings, dreaming of and continuing to discuss their future. Our extended families (of which there are many!) were slowly meeting one another over time and we were so pleased with how natural those interactions felt. Ellie and Jacob’s connection was profound and will always endure, and our immense gratitude for Jacob experiencing that type of unconditional love goes beyond words. It was a pleasure to watch their young lives taking shape. If they had been together for “A Thousand Years” we bet they would not have run out of adventures.
The future now looks different for all of us. We are better for having known Jacob “Sully” Sullivan. His tragic and sudden passing has left a hole in our hearts. Jacob was laid to rest in a private service on Friday, June 28, 2024. He will be sorely missed.
Jacob, we are so proud of you, and we love you so much.
Prayers are appreciated. Memorial donations can be made to Stray Rescue of St. Louis, Endangered Wolf Center, or a charity of your choice.
A beautiful remembrance of a beautiful life. Jacob’s warm presence and smile will forever live on in our minds and hearts. Much love, tenderness, and peace to all those who adored and cherished him so dearly as we.
Thank you, Margaret & Nick
I remember meeting Jacob at Ellie’s birthday party. I brought my boyfriend with me to her birthday party, and him and Jacob immediately bonded! They immediately started talking about video games. The armory has a large chess board and Jacob and my boyfriend immediately took a liking to this. They played for over an hour and were so excited about this huge chess board. At the end of the night, Jacob, gave me and my boyfriend a hug. I thought this was so kind of him since we had just met. I will never forget the kindness that Jacob showed me and my boyfriend. Jacob is dearly missed by all.
We love hearing these memories. ❤️
❤️❤️
Jacob left a legacy of wisdom, humor and love of family. The world has lost someone very special. Rest in peace Jacob,
Richard & Maureen Owens
Thank you 💕 I’m glad my parents have wonderful friends like you.
Dear Maureen & Dick,
Thank you so much for your kind words.
You can understand our Grief. You are life long friends & your support is sincerely appreciated.
Love, Jessie & John
At Ellie’s birthday party earlier this year, I met Jacob. I brought my boyfriend with me to her party, and they immediately bonded. They could not stop talking about their favorite video games. At Ellie’s birthday party, they also found a giant chess board and were enamored by that for hours. At the end of the night, Jacob, gave my boyfriend and I a hug. I thought this was so kind since he had just met us. I will never forget the kindness that Jacob showed me and my boyfriend. He is dearly missed.
What a beautiful tribute for a beautiful young man!!! You are all in our thoughts and prayers. Love, the DeCampi family
Thank you ❤️
Lovely message – I wish I had gotten a chance to get to know him. All of the best to all of you.
Thank you, Jeff. 💕
I did not really know Jacob except from seeing him come and go from Ellie’s home. He often seemed to lend a hand to Ellie and her Mom demonstrating kindness and respect to Ellie and the family.
Thank you, we love hearing these observations. As my Dad said, he grew into being such a gentleman.
Thank you, Judy. He always helped us with anything, as he did for anyone who needed help. ❤️
A beautiful tribute to a special young man. With prayers for peace and comfort.
Thank you all ❤️
Having Jacob be a part of our lives the past nine years and more intimately the past five years has been an honor and a blessing. Now there is a hole in our hearts and in our family.
I always knew Ellie was safe when she was with Jacob. The love they shared was evident in their daily interactions and words.
Jacob was always willing to help me around the house. When he found out one of my windows didn’t lock he immediately went home and brought back some gadgets to secure the window. This is the kind of man he was.
I will miss him at our family dinners, I will miss his big shoes sitting by the front door, I will miss seeing him cook in my kitchen and I will miss seeing the love and joy in Ellie’s eyes because of Jacob’s love for her.
I love you Matt and Beth and my heart hurts for you and your loss. I love you Ellie and your mama will always be here to hold you when your heart hurts.
Rest in Peace dear Jacob.
Love, Mama P (Jacob’s name for me)
Thank you, Lisa. I love this so much. I can picture the memories you describe. 💕
Jacob was a brother to me when I needed a friend. I thank God for having been able to spend so much time with him our last couple years of high school. He knew what I was going through and did all he could to help get me out of my house and just hang out and talk.
He always made sure everyone around him was okay and comfortable. He had such a gift for fostering and building a community where ever he was.
From randomly dragging a group of us to a dojo with close to no explanation, to helping to throw the prom after party, getting me to help him run goalie drills, and just picking me up in high school when we were bored and just wanted something to do.
Sully, I’ll miss you brother. Thank you for always being you man.
❤️❤️❤️
KeShon,
Thank you so much for sharing this; we had no idea. We miss him greatly and memories help
“Sully” was such a sweet and genuine person. I have so many memories of him and I goofing off in our psychology classes, at homecoming, or in the junior area. After I heard of his passing I went through every picture and video on my phone and loved how many memories I will get to keep of him that I had decided to capture on video. I am heartbroken that he and Ellie won’t be able to continue to build their adult lives together, but I know that I (and everyone else) have a better life because I got to know him.
Hope you’re enjoying heaven Sully!
– “Lil Cine” (his nickname for me in high school)
Thank you, Francine. ❤️ It’s so nice to have the happy memories to revisit. 💕
Thank you, Francine ❤️❤️.
My heart is breaking as I read all these memories. I was Jacob’s AP psychology teacher at Metro and have such fun memories of him and his classmates. He was always a comedian (as Francine mentioned above, he and his friends always gave me a reason to smile (or sometimes roll my eyes) at 7 am. I remember him having the most insightful questions and also his attempts to “hack” my class (basically find ways to earn the highest grade while doing the least amount of possible work 😆). Some of my favorite memories of Jacob are when he begrudgingly became the parent of a raw egg in the name of psychology and while outwardly he pretended to find my project silly; I can tell you he secretly developed quite the soft spot for his “egg baby”.
I am heartbroken for Jacob’s parents and Ellie (also a student of mine who I absolutely adore) and all for Jacob’s friends (all of whom he loved so dearly) . He was truly an amazing young man and his presence in this world will be deeply missed.
That’s exactly him. 😂 ❤️ He would say I only need x percentage on this test/assignment to get x grade in the class – that’s all I need to do – time management? 😊 His questions certainly did have a way of cutting through the noise.
I vaguely remember the “egg baby.” I know he enjoyed your class. Thanks so much for sharing this. 💕
Thank you for your kind words, Mrs. Eplin❤️❤️. That is definitely Jacob, even in college😂. He would have an assignment due at 11:59 pm and would say, “Let me just start it at 11:45 pm to see if I can get it done in that amount of time.” It always stressed me, but he always got it done on time and did so well. I love how you mentioned the egg baby project, he did secretly develop a soft spot for it.
Matt and Beth, we wish so much that we had known Jacob better than we did. He sounds like a truly amazing person, and I know he will be missed. Thinking of both of you during this heartbreaking time.
Thank you 💕
I play bridge with Jessie I remember Jacob coming in several times so good looking and such a gentle man. His kindness was in his eyes. I know he is in God’s hands!
Brenda Hamby
❤️
Dear Brenda & Steve,
Thank you so much for your kind words & support in the heart breaking tragedy.
Love, Jessie & John
One of the biggest things I’ll miss about Jacob is that when he was your friend, he cared about you holistically. Sully was not only interested with the things he had in common with his friends. He showed interest and enthusiasm about people as a whole. He genuinely cared and would ask about every aspect of your life. He always wanted to know you were safe, secure, healthy and happy. If he felt that he could assist in any area of your life, he would go out of his way to do so, no matter what that entailed. He is also an extremely empathetic person. He would listen with an open mind and an open heart. He would reserve judgement, while trying to understand and relate to his friends in the most positive and caring ways. Truly, Sully cared about people with his whole being, and wasn’t afraid to show it. He was so genuine, caring and understanding, and only ever wanted the best for everyone in his life. He was an amazing person, a loving friend, and a good man. I’ll miss him dearly.
I can see that Jacob was a bright and shining star. He could light up a life, be a star on the field and court, and in the heart of all who love him. He will always be loved and respected for his values and person. He brought joy and love to his family, friends and extended family. May all who knew and loved Jacob be aware of his presence wherever you are-near or far-
here or there. His star is in the sky shining brightly for you!
Thank you so much, Barb and Wayne. ✨💕
Dear Barb & Wayne,
Thank you so much for your kind words.
Love, Jessie & John
Dear Barb & Wayne,
Thank you so much for your kind words.
Your love and support are truly appreciated.
Love, Jessie & John
Thank you, Elia. This is a beautiful and moving tribute to your friend. We so appreciate you sharing it. Thank you
I love you, my bb. Forever and always. ❤️
❤️❤️❤️
I feel so happy to read all these memories about Jacob that he was so much full of energy which can leave smile to anyone.
Rest in peace, Jacob.
Beth & Matt, Stay Strong !
Thank you, Akhil, for reading the memories and for being there for me at work. We appreciate your support.
From going to school with Jacob since he came to Kennard, to running in the same friend groups, to him coming up to Mizzou while I was living with Ellie, I’ve seen the kind of person he is and how he treated others. He loved my dear friend Ellie with all his heart. He was the type of person who wanted everyone to be happy and at ease. You all raised a wonderful young man. Everyone is in me and my families thoughts 🤍.
Thank you, Angelica, for your kind words. 💕 We appreciate you sharing that with us.
Jacob’s Grandmother Jessie is a friend that I have known 30+ years when we were both still working. I remember how excited she was for her first Grandchild. Her weekly schedule was hectic, but on Friday it was Jacob’s day. She loved every minute of watching him until he began school. I feel as I know many of the family members through stories his Grandmother Jessie told me. I am so very sorry for all of their loss and pray some of his memories help with this time of grieving.
Thank you for your condolences, Debbie. I remember talking to pre-school-aged Jacob about what the plans for a specific Friday with his Nana might be. Jacob told me he wanted to go swimming. It was winter. So, while they sometimes had access to an indoor rec center for swimming, I was trying to prep him that Nana might not want to go swimming in winter. Jacob told me, in no uncertain terms, “Nana will do whatever I want to do.“ I had to admit, he was right. 💕 I was not quite sure what to make of such a young boy, not only understanding that, but being able to articulate it. We are so glad that Nana and Jacob had their separate special days together. ❤️ And we appreciate you remembering and sparking this funny memory for me.
Dear Debbie,
Thank you so much, this is such a GREAT LOSS for our Family. We sincerely appreciate your kind words & prayers.
Love, Jessie & John
I remember seeing Jacob with his grandmother, Mrs Nelke, at The Magic House. Incidentally, I refuse to call by her first name. It’s the respect thing when you grow up with a classmate, Jeff, and his mother is always known as Mrs. Nelke. Anyway, I was there with my daughter and ran into them And spend a great deal of time catching up while the kids played. Myy daughter, Mara, follow Jacob through the tunnels and all the other things at this great avenue for kids..They had a great time. And I will always remember his playing and having a wonderful time. He is in heaven with God now and we will see him again.
Thanks, Denny, for sharing that memory. Jacob played well with younger kids and readily adapted. He loved the Magic House! His Nana & Papa purchased memberships so he could go often. Thanks again for remembering him. 💜
Today I was thinking about Jacob, as I often do, and my beautiful cousin Beth.
It is approaching 1 year (Thanksgiving) since I last spoke with Jacob. Our family Thanksgivings are always bustling with a lot of people and conversations. I remember looking at Jacob and thinking… how in the world is he an adult? It felt like a minute ago that Beth was pregnant and then entered this delightful little guy! We talked briefly about life, and I was so impressed by the way he carried himself. The last thing I said to him was “Ok Jacob, look at you adulting.” We laughed and moved along to the next conversation.
Later in the evening I saw him speaking to Matt, just the two of them. I remember feeling warm and love witnessing their interaction… relating it to my own family and raising boys.
All my love to you all.
That’s beautiful, Julie. We cherish these memories. So glad you had a chance to connect with him. Thank you for taking the time to share with us. 💜
My heart still breaks for you….