Jean Marie (McCaffrey) Ahillen, 98, a lifelong resident of St. Louis, Missouri, died July 24, 2026, at the family home in which she had lived for 68 years.
Mrs. Ahillen was born March 6, 1928, the youngest of five children. She recalled that her parents did not have a telephone at their home in South St. Louis. Their neighbors had to hand their phone through the window so her mother could call the doctor when it neared time for her daughter’s birth. She was born at home on Shenandoah Avenue and officially named Jeanne Marie McCaffrey, although no one can remember her ever spelling her first name Jeanne. Her curly, reddish hair was so lovely that as a young child she was selected “Little Miss Redhead of St. Louis” in a citywide contest.
She grew up playing jacks and taggers (tag) in South St. Louis with her cousin and best friend Shirley Dickhaus. She fondly remembered walking to the open-air Princess Theater on Pestalozzi Street, where for 10 cents she could watch movies under the stars. She loved ice skating and would ride a streetcar with her friends to skate at Winter Garden on DeBaliviere Avenue. She recalled walking home from school on California Avenue when a man rushed out from a storefront and told her and others that Pearl Harbor had been bombed.
The family attended St. Francis de Sales Catholic Church. She went to St. Francis de Sales grade school and St. Alphonsus (Rock) High School, where she finished first in her class academically. She was on the newspaper staff at Rock but otherwise did not join any clubs because she started working in the store at Valley Farm Dairy at age 15 and did not have the extra time.
She married Paul HenryJAhillen on Nov. 26, 1949. Although they had attended the same grade school, the couple really did not get acquainted until they were young adults and participated in a production of the play “Arsenic and Old Lace” staged by the Benton Dramatic Club at St. Francis de Sales.
During the first eight years of their marriage, they lived on Iowa Avenue across the street from Valley Farm Dairy where Mr. Ahillen worked. In 1958, they moved to the home near Grant’s Farm in South St. Louis County where they were to raise their seven children. Mrs. Ahillen liked to laugh. She joked that Anheuser-Busch Brewery owner August “Gussie” Busch Jr., who owned a lavish estate at Grant’s Farm, was her neighbor.
The family home was a busy place with nine people to feed, plus laundry and cleaning. She made time to read to her children, listen to their troubles, attend their ball games and instill in them the values of hard work, respect and honesty.
Mrs. Ahillen loved to bake. She would hide many tins of delicious Christmas cookies she produced to keep her children from eating them before the holidays.
She got her first driver’s license at age 48. She worked at St. Anthony’s Medical Center (now Mercy Hospital South) and for the Lindbergh School District at Truman Middle School and Sappington Elementary School.
She volunteered at the hospital, Fox Theatre and St. Catherine Laboure School kindergarten. She also volunteered at St. Catherine Laboure Church, where she was a church member for 68 years and attended mass daily for many years.
She enjoyed traveling. She visited Italy, the American West, the East Coast and numerous other destinations near and far.
Gardening was another pastime. The big backyard worn bare by many children’s baseball and football games transformed into a showplace of lush trees, blooming flowers and vibrant green grass.
She loved reading and walking. She would hike the mile or so to Tesson Ferry Library then on Lindbergh Boulevard to return home with five or six books only to come back a week or so later to exchange those books for five or six more. As a St. Louis Post-Dispatch subscriber for more than 60 years, she enjoyed discussing current events on the phone with her grown children, many times relating to them a story they had missed in the news.
Through her husband, she developed an interest in sports, following the St. Louis Cardinals and Blues, and later in life especially enjoyed professional basketball. A proud St. Louisan, she kept up with city’s developments and would make sure to visit any new attraction in town. Heading downtown to view the holiday-decorated department store windows was an annual Christmas tradition.
Mrs. Ahillen was devoted to her family. A caring woman of strong character, she was always there for her children. She was most proud that they have all gone on to be successful in life, thanks largely to the guidance and effort she and her husband provided. She expressed great interest in the latest activities of her grandchildren and great-grandchildren.
Once asked to name her happiest moments, she responded, “There have been many. The best times are those when the whole family is together.”
She was preceded in death by her beloved husband Paul Ahillen; her mother and father, Frances and Thomas McCaffrey; siblings Russell, Marion (Winkler), Thomas and James; and grandson James Thomas Ahillen.
She is survived by her children Thomas (Cathy), Steven (Linda Lange), David (Nancy), Daniel (Carol), Mary Jean (Gary) Knapik, Paul Joseph “Joe” (Vicky), and Mary Elizabeth “Betsy”; her grandchildren Caroline “Carrie” (Tim) O’Neil, Elaine “Lainey” Ahillen (Sanjay Deshmukh), Helen (Michael) Ochoa, Joseph (Kathryn), Michael, Jacqueline (Adam) Walker, Steven (Laura), Ryan (Sandra), Kelly (Eric) Hill, Teresa (Jeremy) Hogan, David (Alison) Knapik, Kevin (Colleen) Knapik, Patrick Knapik and Kirstin Robertson. She had 27 great-grandchildren.
The family will have a gathering time at 11 a.m. Aug. 4 at St. Catherine Laboure Catholic Church, 9740 Sappington Road followed by a Funeral Mass at 11:30 a.m. Burial will be at Jefferson Barracks National Cemetery. Arrangements are being handled by Kutis Funeral Home, 10151 Gravois Road. In lieu of flowers, those who wish may donate to a charity of their choice.